Story & Pix by Chris Marais
As part of my editorial duties at Scope Magazine, I took it upon myself to cover fishing derbies, air rallies and yacht races all over Southern Africa.
These gigs were often a welcome break from sitting in a dark room with the tape recorder on, wondering if this week’s crazy man would jump across the room and cut my throat.
Anyhow, it’s somewhere around 1987 and I’m sucking on a beer at a boat club in Mauritius.
There’s a yacht race on the go. I’ve just about had it with all the rich boys and girls in their white yachtie outfits running around yelling:
“It’s wine o’clock!”
As if the rest of us with our big boat envy could give a hoot.
I’m really in trouble here, because unless I start giving a hoot and interviewing all these boat bunnies and their Captain Rons, there’s going to be no story in the bag for Uncle Chris.
And Uncle Editor will be asking questions about expense accounts and time out of the office and such.
Here comes the solution, strutting down the slipway towards the bar. It’s none other than a certain Mr Les Bush.
Les is here on a photographic assignment for the sponsor of this event. Luckily he is just as bored as I am, having taken most of the shots he needs.
Two street journos. A tropical dream island. Multi-million dollar yachts all around. Girls in bikinis. Men in silly hats. Fear and loathing, doctor. Fear and loathing.
Things happen speedily from this point on. We find a friendly taxi driver called Anand and ask him to take us to low dives where they sell cheap liquor.
Enter, stage left, on wobbly legs, the infamous Rhum of Mauritius. All I really remember is the stuff makes you a little bit blinder each morning.
Two days later, I’ve got my story. Half of it comes from Les’ yachting chummy chum chums, the other half is pure street-level Mauritian colour from said low dives we visit in Port Louis, the capital.
And the re-connect with Mr Bush has been made.
I have, I must admit, been a bit short of a working compadre of late. This Scope job is just no fun on your own.
Les Bush fits the bill perfectly. Great photographer, very good travel partner. Drives an old road warrior BMW that we can commandeer for assignments.
Also, Les is short (“Anyone taller than five feet is a waste of space”, he would often tell me) so he can fit easily into Economy Class seats on flights, and doesn’t cost much to feed.
But he is a Beer Monster.
So we sally forth over the years, to many towns, countries and taverns, on the kind of adventures you only used to read about in booby mags like Scope.
And Les is always better at being Mr Scope than I could ever hope to be.
“Oh, you’re the guy who puts the stars on the nipples,” says someone accusingly at me on a job somewhere.
“No, I write the words for the magazine. The Nipple Stars man works in Durban,” I would reply.
Words. Mmm. Scope. Mmm.
Les, on the other hand, has memorised the names and vital stats of every Scope Magazine centrefold going back to the mid-1960s.
He, subsequently, can wax lyrical to the punters on the subject they really want to know about: the glamour girls of Scope.
No matter that they all come from syndicated British packages. To the readers of Scope, they have become real and available.
And so Les plays to the crowd and they love it.
Words. Who wants to speak to the guy who does “words”?
“You have to understand,” he explains to me on the cement porch of a skanky motel with dodgy disco frontage one day. “If we were The Rolling Stones, I’d be Mick Jagger.”
“And who would I be?” I ask.
“Take your pick. Just not Mick,” replies the cheeky Bush.
“OK. From now on, I’m going to try really hard to be Keith Richards” I venture.
All I hear from the cheap seats is a snortle of derision…
- This is an extract from The Journey Man – A South African Reporter’s Stories by Chris Marais, available in print HERE.
- Also Available in Ebook HERE.
I remember the days of Scope!! Great writing Chris, can’t wait to get my hands on a copy. Regards to Julienne. Good luck…Mario
Christopher: ‘hi china, i hear you’re selling your bike…?”
The best days on the streets of the ‘Brow with a budget nogal!
I will collect my autographed copy soon, in person!
Can’t wait to read it!
Are you the journalist whom interviewed Vincent Kelly back in 1985, the South African Stowaway? I am trying to get my hands on your article that was written in Scope, I was married to him many years ago, and as this is part of his children’s legacy I would like to show them, he has since passed away.
Karen
Did not know that Vincent was married or had children.
Hi there Karen, I was just wondering if you ever got a reply to this request. I have often wondered about Vincent as he was a friend of my ex-husband. I am sorry to hear that he passed away. Regards Hilary Lavis
Hi Karen , Guido here. I’ve got a copy of that Scope edition for you…. March 8th 1985. Sms 0825692914 Pretoria
Karen , I’ve got a copy of that Scope magazine. Email me on guido@gioia.co.za. Send me an address and I’ll send it to you.
Hi Karen
I was in the South African Railways Police stationed at the Ben Schoeman Airport in East London. The first time Vincent stowed away was on a SAA flight to East London, Eastern Cape. I escorted him back to Johannesburg by plane. We were met by the SAR Police detectives and took him back home to his parents. At the time they were living in Rhodesfield, Kempton Park. After he was caught in London and made International headlines, our local newspaper also published an article.
Kindest regards
Michele Krause Leslie
Karen I grew up with vincent and phillip our parents where very close. I often wondered for many years what had become of him. Sorry to hear or read of his passing any idea what happened to Phillip or where he is
Hi there,
I am trying to get my hands on a photo that was used in scope magazine of my dad surfing I have no idea who else to turn to so am hoping you can help me
Hi Karen. Sorry to hear about Vincent. I was actually at school with him for a short period of time in Queenstown and heard a few legendary stories including the stowing away to England. He was quite a legend!!
Alec